I Want To Be A Part Of A Rollerblading Gang

If you live in South East London you will know exactly what I am talking about. You'll be sat at traffic lights or waiting to cross the road when all of a sudden a gaggle of youths on roller blades will come streaking past you, some even going backwards on their skates. BACKWARDS, IT TOOK ME LONG ENOUGH TO GO FORWARDS. I even saw one member of a rollerblading gang once carrying a boom box. It was like they had rolled all the way along the road from 1985. The real question is, when did rollerblading become cool again? Was it the introduction of the rollerblading bobbies in Hyde Park. Is this a new way for the gangs to be one step ahead of the 'feds' anyway, I'm going to say it now. I want to be part of this gang. I used to have a pair of roller blades when I was little and it's like riding a bike, surely? I have my eye on a banging pair of Power Rangers roller skates so I will get back to you when I finally become one of the cool kids in the rollerblading gang.

Pet Hate #132. Mullet dresses.

You know the ones, they are longer at the back than they are at the front. I just don't understand them. Do the back of girls leg's get hotter than the front and more ventilation is needed? Is it some sort of cover up of bad, back leg, fake tanning? Maybe it is actually all part of an idea in which all women become superheros and take off using the mullet bit of their dresses? 

Maybe there is a 'back of the leg complex' that I know nothing about. Are people really that worried about how the backs of their legs look? If you are prepared to get the front bit out why not the bit at the back? 

It's not like even anyone good wears them. The mullet dress is favoured by the Essex girls and those I see stumbling out of 'The Venue' club in New Cross at 4am, clutching a box of fried chicken and their ridiculous, studded heels. 

Maybe if the mullet dress looked like an actual mullet, all eighties footballer and scraggly, then I could go for it but essentially it's a dress where they have forgotten to cut the back bit off.