Getting Gomez-merised.

Now, for some of you, my little brother included, I believe that if I said the word 'Gomez' to you you would instantly think of a football player. If you have read this blog at all or probably gathered anything from the first sentence of this post my first thought upon hearing the word 'Gomez' is to reply 'Selena'. 
Selena is one of the seemingly endless Disney Channel princesses of which Miley Cyrus is the High-Queen. Each one follows the same format. Begin on a Disney Channel Children's TV show titled something like 'Aww Chucks, My Brother's An Alien', then try and break free of the Disney mould, go out with a bad-boy popstar and then release a single that is ridiculously catchy. Now as someone who has spent the last year listening to Ernie.K.Doe and weird house music mixes of Sister Sledge, Gomez has dropped of the radar a bit for me, until I came home. My local radio station absolutely love her. Every time I get in the car they are blaring out her latest single, 'Come And Get It'. (There is the provocative, 'let's break the Disney mould', title I was looking for). The first time I heard it, about 3 weeks ago, I turned straight over. By the 12th time Lincs FM decided to play it whilst I was in the car it had grown ridiculously on me. As someone who appreciates when a song is brilliant within it's genre 'Come And Get It' is, in my opinion, one of the best pop songs released this year. It's got so many good bits. A ridiculously catchy chorus, a ballad-esque bridge that you can scream along to in your car, Indian sounding bits reminding you of the other 'I shouldn't love it but I do' pop song of the last decade, Jai-Ho and a brilliant sing along bit that we can all understand the 'eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh' bit of the chorus. 
I know I shouldn't love it, but I do. Selena, you may have gone out with Bieber but I can forgive you if every pop song you write is as good as this/provides a vowel sound chorus to sing along with. 

Why I Want To Be Kris Jenner/A Kardashian

In today's blog-post I am going to tell you why I want to be Kris Jenner, or in fact any part of the Kardashian/Jenner clan, (apart from Bruce, anyone who watches Keeping Up With The Kardashians will understand what I mean.)
I am just going to say it. Kris Jenner is the greatest woman on earth, (bar my Mother of course who, incidentally, reminds me a lot of Kris Jenner's good bits.) To be frank, why wouldn't you want to be Kris Jenner? She lives in a huge house that is completely black and white so it is great if you have dogs as they only see in monochrome. She drinks wine all day, in fact I am considering getting one of my arms chopped off and having a wine glass put there a la an even camper Captain Hook, in her honour. She has about 5 billion daughters that make her about 50 billion pounds a day so she can spend lots of money on huge cars that look like converted tanks painted black and massive weddings for her favourite children (and Rob....)
Kris provides the best moments in Keeping Up With The Kardashians. It seems like she is the butt of every single joke, even down to the time that her lips swelled up in BORA BORA! (you have to shout the place-name like you are a Kardashian on the show), and we all laughed because it looked like she had got dodgy botox done in the room over the off-licence I used to live opposite in South London.
Kris Jenner is basically the Kardashian sister that never was. She lives her life through her three famous daughters, craving attention, constantly holding a massive wine glass full of white wine, driving around in that huge black car and wearing earrings that Pat Butcher would be envious of. But who cares? She is fucking Kris Jenner she can do what she likes.